The Soul Made Visible

I made an agreement with myself many years ago on the day I opened a pink hardcover book, Simple Abundance, A Daybook of Comfort and Joy. Every morning I’d read the page of the day and, as requested in the book’s introduction, I’d write five things I was grateful for. How hard could that be – Right?

I was an angry 30 something woman, having survived a severe illness, struggling with a myriad of autoimmune symptoms and in the throws of a divorce, my three, beautifully strong willed daughters depending on me. I was sick of my world, sick of the anger and sick of being sick! I was about to find out how little I knew about gratitude.

I filled notebook after notebook with my appreciative lists. At first they were polished and neat, the perfect student’s compliance, but as the weeks and months pressed on and life’s complications felt like a ship navigating an ice flow, my lists became scribbles of desperation, small screams scratched out in thin lines on a page. I couldn’t believe, and refused to accept the hole that had swallowed my light. There were days that the best I could muster was:

• I am grateful for my pillow
• I am grateful for my bed
• I am grateful for silence
• I am grateful for breath
• I am grateful for sleep

Somehow the practice of writing, I am grateful, thousands of times over, shifted something in me. The shift grew into a habit until I was seeing beauty in places I’d never paused to notice before. I remember the tipping point, a miraculous day when I realized I was feeling joy more often than not. Eventually I was even grateful for the things that felt difficult or ugly.

“The authentic self is the soul made visible” – Sarah Ban Breathnach

Today, all these years later, my life is blossoming in new directions and that pink hardcover book still occupies space by my bed. No longer filling notebooks, I carry an internal mantra of joyful graces, a symphonic vibration, too big for any one page.

Author: sisterhearts1

I've arrived at an age where standing quietly in the shadows doesn't serve me. Standing in the light of the divine feminine and speaking/writing my truth is as vital as breathing. So here I am, feeling a bit naked as I open a small portal into this superhighway of high speed communications. I don't claim to be a wise woman, but a seeker of heart and spirit, a collector of wisdoms. Since I was a young girl, I've felt spirit in the natural world. I've always stood in the balance of science and magic. Now as I approach another decade, the light of that magic lives in my heart. I find joy in getting older and believe there is great value in the wisdoms we carry. Recently remarried after raising three fiercely beautiful girls on my own, I am now a member of a collective voice of grandmothers and I love this new role. View all posts by sisterhearts1